Occasionally, airline attendants make an effort
to make the in-flight safety lecture and their other
announcements a bit more entertaining. Here are
some real examples that have been heard or reported:
"There may be 50 ways to leave your lover, but
there are only 4 ways out of this airplane..."
Pilot - "Folks, we have reached our cruising
altitudenow, so I am going to switch the seat belt
sign off. Feel free to move about as you wish, but
please stay inside the plane till we land ... it's a
bit cold outside, and if you walk on the wings it
affects the flight pattern."
And, after landing: "Thank you for flying Delta
Business Express. We hope you enjoyed giving us
the business as much as we enjoyed taking you
for a ride."
As the plane landed and was coming to a stop
at Washington National, a lone voice comes over
the loudspeaker: "Whoa, big fella. WHOA!"
After a particularly rough landing during
thunderstorms in Memphis, a flight attendant on a
Northwest flight attendant announced: "Please take
care when opening the overhead compartments
because, after a landing like that, sure as hell
everything has shifted."
From a Southwest Airlines employee.... "Welcome
aboard Southwest Flight XXX to YYY. To operate your
seatbelt, insert the metal tab into the buckle, and pull
tight. It works just like every other seatbelt, and if you
don't know how to operate one, you probably shouldn't
be out in public unsupervised.
In the event of a sudden loss of cabin pressure,
oxygen maskswill descend from the ceiling. Stop
screaming, grab the mask, and pull it over your face.
If you have a small child traveling with you, secure
your mask before assisting with theirs. If you are
traveling with two small children, decide now which
one you love more.
Weather at our destination is 50 degrees with
some broken clouds, but they'll try to have them fixed
before we arrive. Thank you, and remember, nobody
loves you, or your money, more than Southwest Airlines."
"As you exit the plane, please make sure to
gather all of your belongings. Anything left behind
will be distributed evenly among the flight attendants.
Please do not leave children or spouses."
"Last one off the plane must clean it."
And from the pilot during his welcome message:
"We are pleased to have some of the best flight
attendants in the industry...Unfortunately none of
them are on this flight...!"
Heard on Southwest Airlines just after a very hard
landing in Salt Lake City（鹽湖城）: The flight attendant
came on the intercom and said, "That was quite a bump
and I know what ya'll are thinking. I'm here to tell you
it wasn't the airline's fault, it wasn't the pilot's fault, it
wasn't the flight attendants' fault.....it was the asphalt!"
Another flight Attendant's comment on a less than
perfect landing: "We ask you to please remain seated as
Captain Kangaroo bounces us to the terminal."
After a real crusher of a landing in Phoenix, the Flight
Attendant came on with, "Ladies and Gentlemen, please
remain in your seats until Captain Crash and the Crew
have brought the aircraft to a screeching halt up against
the gate. And, once the tire smoke has cleared and the
warning bells are silenced, we'll open the door and you
can pick your way through the wreckage to the terminal.
Part of a Flight Attendant's arrival announcement:
"We'd like to thank you folks for flying with us today. And,
the next time you get the insane urge to go blasting
through the skies in a pressurized metal tube, we hope
you'll think of us here at US Airways."
Key words：
cruising （n.）兜風
altitude （n.）高度
switch ...... off 關掉
loudspeaker （n.）擴音器
unsupervised （adj.）無人監督的
oxygen mask （n.）氧氣罩
belongings （n.）個人物品
intercom （n.）對講機
bump （n.）碰撞
asphalt （n.）瀝青、柏油
crusher （n.）猛烈的一擊
wreckage （n.）殘骸
insane （adj.）發瘋的
以色列、巴勒斯坦：
http://chenhen2013.pixnet.net/blog/post/462697781
＊
成寒英語教材：
http://chenhen2013.pixnet.net/blog/post/288240074
＊
唸〈成寒英語教材〉，托福、多益 TOEIC 考高分成績榜 ＆ 他們的學習歷程：
http://chenhen2013.pixnet.net/blog/post/275932070
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